We are taught to follow what our guardians tell us to do. We believe everything they say without giving it a second thought. What they say is what we say; what we do is what they do.
We all hear the words “you are too young to understand”. We have all felt that same frustration of being left in the dark when an issue is deemed too complex for us. Understanding a situation is important in maintaining a healthy relationship from the guardian to the child. An example of this could be if you had a guardian that had recently gone through a divorce, their mental and emotional state could change. From the perspective of the child, it is hard to understand what the guardian is going through, especially when the child is young. At the least, the child can understand that their guardian isn’t feeling happy. If the guardian chooses to lash out, the child can misconstrue the situation and either blame it on someone else or worse, on themselves. It is difficult for a guardian to explain a complex concept to a child as their guardian. Many guardians deflect questions with, “you will understand when you are older.” This could be due to the fact that most psychological problems within the brain can be traced back to early childhood years.
When we become teenagers, issues become more sensitive to our young minds. Especially when social media has an outside influence. In the teen years, our brains are more impressionable than ever in our lives. When we do not understand certain issues, we have an opportunity to resort to unhealthy coping lifestyles such as drugs, smoking, or alcohol usage. Using highly addictive substances at an early age can lead to a dependence of the substance, and in extreme cases, lead to death.
I understand that from a guardians perspective the complications of explaining sensitive information to a child is difficult. However, the child needs to understand the situation before it could change their future. Communication can solve that problem, and lead the guardian and child to a more fulfilling relationship.
No matter what family you are in, guardians all have the same daunting task: help you through life no matter what happens. When we grow older we just might start to understand.