Left Outside The Circle

It can be upsetting when one is left out of social plans that their friend group has made, especially when they were left out on purpose.


Olivia Gerhardt

Being left out can happen to anyone, whether you realize it or not. Being included isn’t something that always occurs. The factors that lead to not being included are sometimes out of people’s control.

In some cases, there is always that one friend in the friend group who is often left out, the one who is not invited to things, the one who finds out everyone hung out without them from seeing social media posts and the one who cannot come because there is not enough room in the car. 

According to an article written by Pat Blumenthal, being excluded is one of the worst feelings. Ask any teenager and it is the thing they fear the most. It can be anything from not getting an invitation to a party to not getting invited to dinner. 

Sometimes, friends purposely exclude someone from plans that the group made. This does not mean that there is anything wrong with the person being excluded, it could just be the fact that there may already be too many people invited, or that their friends are choosing to be mean. It could also be a one time thing, when the friends only exclude the person once because for some reason they did not feel like inviting them. 

“Obviously, I tried to talk to my friends about being left out, but when they are not the ones being left out they do not seem to understand what I am feeling,” senior Lily Highley said. “Sometimes I would end up getting invited, but mostly not. I wasn’t sure why I was not good enough.” 

When someone is left out of a social outing, talking to the friends that leave one out can help someone understand why they aren’t getting invited to certain things. This could clear up the situation and eventually have everything go back to normal. Or, it could allow the person getting left out to see that they do not want to feel like that again, leading them to keep the friends at arms length. 

“I attempted to try and talk to my friends, but at first they did not care to respond to me,” sophomore Remigijus Ivanovas said. “They left me out of the group for quite a long time. It took awhile, but my friends and I figured out our problems and now we are very close once again.” 

Being excluded from a friend group, whether it is on purpose or not, can hurt. Although, talking it out with friends to see their perspective on the situation can help one make a decision about whether or not they want to continue that friendship.