The perfect relationships people strive to have may be completely out of reach for others. (Valerie Rosek)
The perfect relationships people strive to have may be completely out of reach for others.

Valerie Rosek

The Road of Life Begins With Broken Bridges

Not everyone has perfect relationships with their “most important” role models.

October 28, 2019

Many people are forced to go through life with broken relationships with important figures. These negative relationships have impacts on people’s lives that they have to deal with every day. Everyone needs a person to look up to; with broken relationships with these supposed role models, it is difficult for others to find their person to fill into this role. Parents, teachers, and coaches are examples of these, but in reality, not everyone is blessed with healthy relationships with these people.

School is an environment where everyone should be comfortable and feel welcomed. It is the place that a student travels to every day, and it acts almost like a second home to most. For the people that do not feel this comfort, school is an almost dreadful place. Group work may be hard, participating in class may be scary, and reaching out or talking to new people may not even be a thought in one’s mind. Without this close relationship with the school or people within it, the tasks that most students see as simple may be difficult for others.

I’m not always inclined to go out and talk to new people and find new people.”

— Braxton Schieler

“I am usually an introverted person,” freshman Braxton Schieler said. “I’m not always inclined to go out and talk to new people and find new people.”

People may not feel comfortable reaching out and building new relationships. A school is a place for new adventures and new connections, but many people cannot accomplish that. If one does not feel comfortable, then this may cause people to reject their healthy relationship with the school. 

 

“I hate group work,” Schieler said. “I just hate that moment of putting myself out there when I do not know everyone.”

One needs to put themselves out there in order to create this healthy environment in a place they should be able to express themselves. School environments should be a safe place, and teachers should be role models that a student can always be comfortable around. Some students have hard times in school because they do not create healthy bonds with their teachers. Teachers may not personally be close to their students, but students feel teachers should be people that they look up to and learn from the most. 

“I always try to be respectful in all my classes,” senior Mikayla Holway said. “I feel like it is hard to learn and enjoy my classes when I have a bad relationship with my teachers.” 

Students differ when it comes to their relationships with teachers. Some students may prefer having very close bonds with all their teachers because it will help them succeed in the class, while other students may like to be more independent and do not need a close bond with teachers. 

“Sometimes I find it harder to try in class when I don’t have the best relationship with my teacher,” Holway said. “I wish I had great relationships with all my teachers because I know classes would be much easier.”

If a student does not have a strong relationship with their teachers, then they may rely heavily on their coaches. Some athletes are blessed to have amazing coaches that they love, but others may not have that blessing. If an athlete does not have a healthy bond with their coach, then it may impact their work ethic, or their motivation to play their sport. This could cause conflict on the team, and may even result in lost passion for the sport an athlete loves.

“Sometimes I’m in a bad mood at practice and I’m really frustrated,” junior Maiah Moll said. “It makes me shut everyone out.”

Coaches should be people that an athlete looks up to because that is the figure that is teaching an athlete to get better. Lost respect for a coach may be critical to the team’s passion, and this could cause less success for the team. 

“Last club season I had a coach I didn’t really get along with,” Moll said. “It made me not enjoy the practices as much as I usually would.”

Some athletes may look at coaches as second sets of parents. Parents or guardians are oftentimes seen as the most important people in nearly everyone’s life. Some people may not be fortunate enough to have healthy relationships with both, or even neither of their parents.

Sometimes there are certain things that I would rather talk to my mom about but I’m with my dad, or I want to talk to my dad and I’m with my mom.”

— Logan Schlappi

“Not having both of my parents with me all the time is hard,” junior Logan Schlappi said. “Sometimes there are certain things that I would rather talk to my mom about but I’m with my dad, or I want to talk to my dad and I’m with my mom.”

Many kids take advantage of everyday experiences, such as family dinners, movie nights or talks with their parents or guardians. Other people may not even get to do any of those things. Family is known to be the one thing that everyone needs, but, in reality, not all people have that. Schlappi does not know what it feels like to just live in one place, where others may not even think twice about living anywhere else. 

“The fact that I’m going between two different houses constantly is really hard,” Schlappi said. “Especially during sports when I have to haul all my equipment and gear from place to place.”

These relationships may be perfect in one person’s eyes, but can be the complete opposite in another. If a person is fortunate enough to have healthy relationships and bonds with these figures, others may not have the same opportunity to take advantage of because everyone may not be blessed like them. Most people have these important figures to look up to, but some just may not have any role models at all.

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